This Soft Season

 For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. 

|  Isaiah 9:6  |

We are in the midst of a wonderful season. One that is acknowledged from all ends of the compass. It is a season that is revived again year after year. It is one where there is a special set of songs that play exclusively for about a month (maybe until the New Year) that have catchy tunes and exhibit the creativity of the variety of artists who cover the same song about 30 different times. What a talent that is! It is one of unity, and of celebration. It is one of lights, and of sparkling snow (either real or fake). It is one where Love came to earth and changed all mankind forever. 

I love this season. 

It is one of, unfortunately, great stress. It is one of giving and one of receiving. It is one a great treats and fun decorations. 

It is one of joy, peace, blessings, and calm. 

It is one that highlights the birth of Jesus Christ to the world. 

It is one of hope and one of promise. 

For unto US a child is born. Born of a virgin. Placed by God Himself in the womb.  A miracle. The government will weigh down upon Him, going totally against Him, more than anyone else that we see today, and He will bring peace to those who know Him. There is no fear with Him. 

This season is one of incredible worth and impact. Year round I am reminded of who Jesus is, from beginning to present. He never has ended.

Luke 2:10 And the angel said to them, “Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people.

The life of Jesus from the time that Luke 2:10 was spoken to this very second is endless. He came to bring great joy and peace to all people, not just the "good" ones, the "successful" ones, the "have-it-all-together" ones, the "wealthy" ones, the "smart" ones, the "fashionable" ones, or the Christian ones.       To all. 

There are a few things I have put in word for that I would like to receive this year: a photography camera for leisure and to start a business, leg warmers, moccasins and art supplies. Two of which are practical in using the passions & talents only He has given me, & two that are for comfort and my fashion sense which I have fun with in creativity. 

But, in the season where the mixture birth of Jesus is commemorated and the giving/receiving of gifts is part of what keeps our economy alive, if I had to choose the thing I want that is timeless and gives me life, 

it would be Him. 

Every time I think of Him, there is a balm put over any stress, wound or worry that I have. This season, I am not stressed because of the little baby who grew to a man, who died for not just one friend, but all of them throughout the age of the earth. 

I am so thankful to be surrounded by loved ones, new friends, old friends, kind strangers, and my love this season and every season of life. I am so blessed to be able to serve those for Him, the One who came to give us an option for life, rather than to simply feel good about myself. It is a small part of the minimal portion of what I have to give to Him. The One who came to give it all; Who did not hold anything back in all the right timing. 

What a priceless, perfect, irreplaceable, non-repeatable gift. 

If I don't get any worldly possessions this season, that is fine. I do have passions, but I know that He will always fulfill them in due & loving time.

This season, I hope that you will take some time to allow yourself to go beyond in what this time and every time beyond is about. Find hope in it, receive joy, and dance like you have been set free! I am encouraged in writing this, and I hope you are as well. 

Much love to all readers, 

Rachel Yvonne Kuhl

*Please click the link below to one of my most favorite songs this and every season. I cry every time. I hope you love it as much as I do. It is "Winter Snow" by Audrey Assad.*

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpHiAmL8-b0

|| I M A G E ||

|| I M A G E ||

noun

noun: image · plural noun: images

1. a representation of the external form of a person or thing in art.
   synonyms: likeness · resemblance · depiction · portrayal · representation 

The instant I began to think about writing a post on image, my honest-to-goodness first thought was: "Oh, how cliche." I am sure you know what I mean when I say that. Articles, movies, books, Facebook statuses, tweets, Instagram posts and blogs all over the world touch on the subject of image and inner beauty. However, my next thought was this: every opinion is different in someway. Everyone has a story to tell. Everyone has struggles, and with the concept of image and natural beauty, everyone needs constant encouragement//a sweet reminder of what beauty really is and to be comfortable in your own skin, not someone else's.

Have you ever thought what life would be like if you didn't have your straightener or your buff foundation? What about your favorite lip gloss or that new style that EVERYONE is wearing? What lies would feed on your soul and how far will you go to get those things? 

Something I have been thinking about lately is: what does makeup mean to me? Is it a need or an accessory? Is it a stronghold or a freedom? Does it bring out my insecurity or my artistic side? I am not going to lie to you. I am going to give you the bare minimum, the "nude" foundation: I used to be an irritable, insecure, nervous girl from the get-go and especially when I ran out of makeup, or it wore down throughout the day. I would constantly take trips to the bathroom, and maybe even miss out on something much more valuable, just to "fix myself." I always carried every item of makeup I owned with me, which took up more space than it should have. I was always worrying, always watching my back, always checking in the dark screen of my phone {so it wouldn't be too obvious}, and it sucked the joy out of me. It took my life away. It made me try too hard. 

I have skin blemishes. I have pimples, scars, wrinkles, moderately oily skin. I am working the winter tan year round. I strive for society's perfection when really, I come nowhere close unless I am airbrushed and my physical makeup is dramatically altered by technology. 

I am thankful that throughout the years, that insecurity has been broken down, the walls burned and the foundation of such a life-sucking lie was rolled up out of the soil of my heart. To me now, makeup is an accessory. I do not "need" it anymore, but I do enjoy using it. I also enjoy the time less spent in the morning when I take it easy on the mascara or foundation, or go most of the day without an ounce on my skin. I have noticed that the lighter and less I go on makeup anytime, the healthier my skin looks and the more radiant I am. My boyfriend has told me that my facial expressions look much more defined without the chemically produced stuff caked onto my face. He chooses REAL. 

I haven't been shopping in about 6 months. I haven't had good income since May. No shopping money. No regular coffee money. Barely makeup money. You could say that I have learned a lesson that is most valuable to womankind, in one of the hardest ways. It has really stunk not being able to take a good shopping trip. But that has allowed my creative side to come out and make up these new, eclectic styles of the things that I do own. Talk about thrifty and looking good!

I think it is safe to say that as girls and women, we LOVE to dress up. We love to get our nails done, our hair done, and to keep good health. Those are all normal things and they are so fun! But, there can be too much of a good thing. It can get excessive to where that is all you do. And 99.9% of the time, the root of the excessiveness is insecurity with your physical appearance. Following that, your relational life starts to plunder with your friends. You look for attention from guys where it is not due. You try so hard to be someone you will never be. You just might drown in the fight. Trust me, I used to be that girl, too. Always trying to be someone else. Buried in selfishness. Trying to find the light to get out. The thoughts that ran through my head a million times daily were: "Do they like me? Do they like me? Do they like me? No? Well. I'll try harder. I will take the next step. I will do what it takes."

It is brutal what the lies and the expectations use to torture our souls. Our beautiful hearts. 

In the past year, recognition of my value and my natural beauty has been manifested into my life in such a way that you could only know by experiencing yourself. I have had friends, mentors, books, articles, Bible verses and the love of my life encourage me and build me up in ways I never knew possible. I have let go of all of those which have not built me up, and my vision has become unshaken on the light and the abundant life that is before me. In the past year, my true, natural, real identity has become truth. I have been cleansed in purity and the love of Jesus. I have transitioned from stronghold to freedom. 

If you are reading this, STOP, just for a moment. Take a breath. Now, keep reading.

Go look in the mirror.  

I hope what you see is beautiful. 

I hope what you see is joy-filled. 

I hope what you see is pure. 

I hope what you see is strong. 

I hope what you see is stunning,

I hope what you see is unique. 

I hope what you see is happy. 

I hope what you see is independent: 

of worldly things.

I hope what you see is incredible. 

I hope what you see is hope.

You don't have to try. 

You are beautiful. 

Every blemish, every clothing item you own, every dream, 

every hope, every unique talent, every story. 

Stop trying so hard. 

The world needs your uniqueness.

Without it, it is never the same. 

You are loved most by the ones who love you for who you are.

||  I M A G E ||

For feedback {questions or comments} comment below, or email me at: singlikecrazy@msn.com!

Thank you so much for reading and sharing this post!

Rachel Yvonne Kuhl

*A BIG thank you to the ladies who sent in their lovely natural photos for the video portion of this post. You all are the best and you are such an encouragement.*

Maddy, Brooke, Mary, Krista, Alyssa, JoAnne, Sara, Hunter, 

Alisha, Brittany, Livia, Kiami & Lis.

* Image definition: Oxford Dictionaries *

A Non-Apologetic Post to Hollywood

DISCLAIMER

I have no apologies to make about this post in advance.

So, yesterday I went to that new movie called, "Lucy" with my best friend & better half, Jordan. We got there about halfway through the previews, sat down, and tried to take a few minutes to mentally prepare ourselves for this movie, knowing that it would present a lot of ideas and thought. In our time of trying to not focus too much on the previews, something happened. 

"Mr. Grey will see you now," rang the theatre 22 speakers. 

I knew what was about to be shown {as a light} 
into the darkness of the room. 

And it was not good. 

I do not think any of the 15 souls in that theatre were ready.

I know Jordan and I weren't. 

The preview was for "Fifty Shades of Grey."

From what I know, this now movie, once a book, is one literally focusing on trafficking, pornography and sex-by-chains throughout its entirety to the core. TO THE CORE. What started out as a harmless job interview went to straight-up, pleasurable captivity. What is this to hurt? ...A LOT. 

I know it has become a normal thing in previews in the theatre, on your DVD, Netflix, television, etc. to see some sort of sexual or nude scene. Quite frankly, it has become the normal, yet we cringe in some way, almost embarrassed to look at the screen, every single time one of these scenes comes on. But then, part of us wants to look. Why? Because it intrigues us. And makes us feel "good." 

So what is so different about this movie? 

• It is taking the sex industry, in every form, one step further instead of two steps back. 
• The core of this film is all you see the entire time. 
• Not a word came from anyone in theatre 22 once the preview was finished. 
• It is allowing a worldwide problem to have a closer impact in our homes. 
• It is distorting and ruining the reason for sex; and sorry, it is not only for your pleasure at your convenience. 

If anything, this movie should make you extremely uncomfortable. 

I know, I know: some would say "but it's all Hollywood's fault for making this movie." Hollywood is at fault for allowing this to take place, but so are you for endorsing it. The sex industry. 

---->{The industry where thousands upon millions of men, women, boys and girls are lied to, and either surprisingly or abruptly taken into captivity, for sex: clients, a porn magazine, a porn movie, a porn YouTube video, a strip club, a gentleman's club, movies, books, pictures, chat rooms, etc. They are held against their will, but some choose to stay. They are abused, put on drugs, and...screaming silent screams to get out}. It is everywhere. Like a poison. It spreads. 

The human mind is a delicate thing & a precious thing. I am not saying don't go see this movie, because that is your own choice. The effects are on you. But if you are saying, "No WAY am I seeing that," then well, you and I are in the same boat and infuriated. 

My infuriation is hate for this movie. Hate for the sex industry. Hate for the distorted sex that the world has been given on a silver platter to live by. The endorsement of this film in particular, I say, is an all time low for Hollywood. Don't waste your $5-10 ticket on fuel to the sex industry. It starts here. 

With much love, 

Rachel Yvonne

"Special": Exceptional or Not?

DISCLAIMER: This topic is really close to my heart. I apologize in advance for any random ramblings, unprofessional writing, or emotional happenings.

Question: How many people in your community, your region, or the world with a disability do you know? What kind of disability? How does it affect their, and maybe your, every day life? 

I know my answer to this question is existent. I know quite a few people with a disability of some sort; more than I thought I did. They range anywhere from being wheelchair-ridden, to speech impairment, hearing impairment, vision impairment, lower than usual cognitive understanding, certain diets, health problems, and a range of serious surgeries to minor operations. 

I believe that only He can heal of these disabilities; He has that power. But, that is only of His will. I  believe that each person born with a disability was meant to be a blessing, not a curse. A joy, not a pain. One that of which their disability brings people together rather than parents filing for divorce. 

There are more people in this world with a disability of some sort than we think. I bet you know someone. And if you don't, I encourage you to reach out to them. They are not a different species, they are people. They have dreams. They have desires. They want a job. They want friends. They love their family. They desire to learn how to drive. Some want to open restaurants. Others want to become an artist. Others want to sing, play professional sports, learn the piano, travel the world, help others in need, and most of all, they were made to love. 

Another question: when you hear of someone who has a disability that sounds funny, do you laugh or do you get serious and get the guts up to try to get to know them or gain the motivation to know someone who is disabled? 

I just want to say boldly right now: in what stretch of the imagination is the word "retarded" ever okay? 

The word retarded has made people of all ages laugh on their sides for years in the past but not for years to come. It is mainly used as a joke to call someone stupid or dumb. It has occurred to me that there are actually people, living human beings, out there who do not have the mental capacity that you do. And that is no joke. This is not a laughing matter. The"R" word is used on them...daily. And it hurts. Deeper than sticks or stones. Special Olympics athlete says this:

"The R-word is EXCLUSIVE

“What’s wrong with "retard"? I can only tell you what it means to me and people like me when we hear it. It means that the rest of you are excluding us from your group. We are something that is not like you and something that none of you would ever want to be. We are something outside the "in" group. We are someone that is not your kind. I want you to know that it hurts to be left out here, alone.” – Joseph Franklin Stephens, Special Olympics Virginia athlete and Global Messenger"

(http://www.r-word.org/r-word-effects-of-the-word.aspx)

There is a great organization called Spread the Word to End the Word. I encourage you to check it out. It is a beautiful thing. 

Yet another question: if you do know someone with a disability, how have they changed your life? What effects have they made, and how have you seen their life progress? Reflect on that. As you do, I have a little story.

Almost 2 years ago, I was surprised by a very straightforward and yet lavishly beautiful call on my life. Two years ago was when my heart was opened wide to those with disabilities. Now keep in mind, I used to be absolutely terrified of people with a disability, because they were different than me. How ridiculous is that? Since then, I knew what I had to do. I had to meet people with disabilities, become their friend and really understand the amazing things in which they are called to do; some things I bet none of us could ever dream of doing. The first person that I came directly in contact with was a boy with Down Syndrome. Needless to say, he changed my life. He gave a motivation I had never known. He inspired me to be more than what I was living. He showed me that with God, nothing is impossible (Luke 1:37). 

He played almost every position on the Special Olympics baseball team. He led communion for his family at church. He was always exhilarated over bike riding, "packing high" and going somewhere over the mountains (traveling), swimming, running, playing video games, watching NCIS repeatedly, and helping his dad build houses. He learned that he loved chocolate milk and catching crawdads in a nearby pond. He also learned frisbee and loved it. He loves to sing. He is very good at helping with laundry, tickle fights, coloring, making fun of you, wrestling, hiding and making new friends. 

Needless to say, he is incredible. 

I have met others who have chosen to live life to the fullest. I have one who just got baptized and she loves going to concerts. I have another who just got promoted to be an Assistant Manager for King Soopers. I saw one who normally would have the most difficult time forming full sentences come up to a microphone in front of thousands of other teenagers and adults in an arena praying for his school. I have seen the joy when music comes on, and the love when someone is feeling sad. I know one who is just so encouraging and so comforting in any and every situation. Tim is a very good example that someone with a disability can do anything: 

In our world, in our friendships, work environments and churches, this is a demographic that is very absent and made silent. My heart is to make them less silent. This post, I pray, helps. Part of my dream is to write a book and speak; the target including those with disabilities. I ask for your support and prayers as I continue to travel towards reaching this dream and changing the lives of numerous people forever in what I have been given to say. 

In this post, I speak with truth, grace, love, urgency and I hope, inspiration. I know I have been inspired. 

Please take some time to reflect and feel free to share this to anyone and everyone you know.

If you have any questions or comments on this post, give a shout out! 

Much love, 

Rachel Yvonne

xoxo

21 and Single: Is He really enough for me?

It is a daily struggle. One day I am thrilled and enjoying being a single, 21 year old lady, and the next, I am scarfing down Ben & Jerry's cookie dough ice-cream, texting my best girl friends; complaining, and drowning my brain in chick flick movies just to "feel better." As I began to write this, my roommate came out and squealed over how excited she was to watch "Just Wright." A chick flick. I have never ever seen this movie. But by her reaction, the longing in her heart exploded right in front of my face.

 I have had a fair share of relationships so far in my lifetime. All of which ended at some point, for better or for worse, but they shaped me. Believe it or not. They all had a little corner of impact on my life. Although, I cannot help but think of Beyonce's "Single Ladies" at this point and time.

We must understand that:

                         [:: We are made for relationships::]

I do not regret anything from the past. I have been cut deep; some of which have healed completely, others which have left scars. Healed, but still visible. Healed, and somehow, He makes them beautiful. Even though these relationships ended, and even though it hurt so bad sometimes that I got sick, His promise remains full. He is faithful. He will provide for me. He loves me. I will know when (and who) that man is in His will. The one in which He has called him to love me unconditionally and I, in return. 

I am sure some of you can, without a doubt, agree with me when I say: holy relationships, engagements & weddings! People, they are literally everywhere. Ladies, this is what we want. This is what we desire. To be loved by a man. Unconditionally. Who knows our hearts and makes us laugh. Who walks with us and supports us in our dreams. Who loves us tenderly and cares even when we think we don't need him; that we can handle it on our own. This is hard seeing all of this come up around us. IT IS PRESSURE. It makes us cry at night. It makes us flirt excessively. It makes us DESPERATE. But what are we desperate for? What is it that we so long for? 

Ladies, for me, oh, I think about my per se "dream" man OFTEN. Like he really is Prince Charming or something... I look for his characteristics in every single guy I meet. I look. I seek. I find, but sometimes, it just "doesn't work out" with that so called "maybe, baby." And I get hurt, trying...to make him like me. When really, that is not what God wants for me and my heart.

I would like for you to take a moment and think about or write down the characteristics of your dream guy...

Now, here are my 10 top traits:

1) He has to deeply love Jesus.

2) He has to make me laugh.

3) He has to have some musical ability/inclination (vocal/instrumental). 

4) He has to support me in my dreams. 

5) He has to have at least a little bit of a traveler's heart.

6) He has to be good looking (at least to me). 

7) He has to be able to cook, bake/want to learn how.

8) He has to be confident and growing in confidence. 

9) He has to be loving. 

10) He has to be kind and respectful. 

Do we have any in common? :)

In writing out these traits, at one point, past experiences, traits that I know I like, and traits that I would love to find all popped into my little brain at some point or another. That is common! If you have no experience with past relationships, that's okay! I believe firmly that these specific traits have been laid on your heart for a reason; because they are compatible with you and who you were created to be. 

Now, for me, one trait that is really hard to accept about a man sometimes is that when something is wrong with you, it is common that he tries to fix it. He wants to be the hero. The one who makes it all better. And ladies, we hate this sometimes! It's a battle of I really love that you care, stop talking to me...I can handle this myself or you don't care. I just need someone to cry with me. Go away. Is this not true? We have to realize that when this happens, he is only trying to care. But in reality, we ALSO want those who will cry with us. That's when the girl friends come in; with the 4 pound Hershey bar. 

We use yet another 4 pound Hershey bar like 2 days later to get us through this time of singleness in our lives. One thing that I have realized lately is that: maybe this time of singleness I am in is for the betterment of myself and of the man I marry before we even meet. I know, it is hard to enjoy a time like this when the world around you is throwing the pressure of happy relationships and 50,000 engagements and marriages at a time at you daily. It is hard to be satisfied. Truly satisfied. Like we are starving all the time for something more. Something that we long and dream for; which is normal. 

Today, I was thinking: "Am I ever going to get married?" I texted two of my best lady friends and asked them the same question. Both responses were great, but there was one that just blew me away that I just had to share with you. She says this:

Girl, you are not alone on that one! I go in between stressing out thinking I'll never get married and then enjoying being single...I heard someone compare being single to fasting--there are a lot of parallels: it's okay to long for food, but if we just wait til the fast is over, we didn't get anything out of it. It's not about giving up food, but what you turn your focus to. We are designed to want food and we are designed to want a relationship. We aren't supposed to feel guilty for wanting that...God really knows us and what's in the future. 

This word from my dear friend really made a lot of sense in my mind. And was so encouraging. In our time of singleness, it is not about being single, it is about what and who we turn our focus to in that season. It is not wrong to want a relationship or to be married, but it all has its own time. And in that time, we must be satisfied with what God has given us and who He is for us. 

You could say that everyday, I know that His promise for me is true and unchanging. In this time of singleness, I know in my heart that He has someone in mind that I just might like. Someone who comes no where close to what my past relationships were for me. Someone who is better. Because in this time, I have grown, and you will, too, to be better. It is because of Him that I have a hope in my heart for the future. I will still struggle daily, but it is His promise, and only His promise, that I have to hold onto. Not the pint of Ben & Jerry's ice-cream I bought a few days ago (literally), not for all of the chick flicks, love songs, or chocolate in the world. But for Him. 

In this time of singleness, press into the precious opportunity of growing in yourself. Get to know your dreams, your desires, and take the time to appreciate it all. I know I have. And then, one day, he will come for the pursuit of his "lady in waiting." And it will be just so beautiful. Sisters, have faith. You are breathtaking! You will be provided for. And your story of waiting will be one worth sharing. 

If you would like to share a story with me, or just to talk, ask questions, etc, please email me at:

singlikecrazy@msn.com

I am here for you and would love to walk this journey with you!

Much love, beauties,

Rachel Yvonne Kuhl

Marriage & Ministry: Not-So-Fairytale

Night classes normally are not what someone would describe as the "best thing in the world." They are long, sometimes boring, and all you can think about is hibernating until the next Marvel or Nicholas Sparks movie comes out. 

I am in a night class on Mondays called Practical Theology. I know, it sounds like we all might as well just start drooling and playing Frogger now. But really, this class has impressed me. The topics covered and talked about have not been easy; not once. 

Tonight, we talked about marriage and ministry. It sounds like just a normal topic spoken about inside and outside of the Church, but really it is quite as polar opposite as the north is to the south. 

Here are 84 different points that were made by a panel of two ministry couples, one of which works at Colorado Christian University as professors. These are the opinions and experiences of those in the class and those who were part of the panel. There is such beauty in them all. Read through them. You might find something you have never begun to think about. See if there are any that you can relate to: married, single, dating, or engaged...

1) Just because one of you is called to something, doesn't mean the other is too.

2) There is a difference in volunteering to partake and expectation. 

3) The schedule (in ministry) is a little bit of a challenge sometimes.

4) As a family, or spouse, involved in ministry, you are very, very cared for.

5) How do you make your community and social life in church when your spouse may be working through something with them?

6) It can be demanding and people have expectations of you: appearance, behavior, etc. 

7) Be able to have boundaries between ministry and private life. 

8) Husbands and wives working on church staff—healthy? Prayer. 

9) When the future is distant, it seems super impossible. 

10) Giving is very big in relationships. It is poisonous to be selfish. 

11) Best for my spouse/family? Or best for me?

12) That other person is going to have a calling on their life, too. 

13) Better to understand this somewhat before getting married. 

14) Share life. 

15) Biggest challenge is learning to work together. 

16) Go where God is putting on your heart. 

17) Two different ships going in two different directions does happen sometimes. 

(Just don't marry that person)…

18) Bring the stress home? —-> People who lead in the Church, still have problems. 

19) It is hard to keep stuff from your best friend (they can read you). 

20) Let stuff out in a healthy way; whether it’s on your spouse or something/someone else.

21) Be able to vent/know other couples in ministry that go to different churches. 

22) Make sure to get out; plan it; weekly/monthly, etc. in a healthy way

23) Always be biased to your spouse. 

24) Be careful in how you approach conversations about other people that your spouse may know. 

25) Be able to discern well. 

26) Constant juggling act. 

27) Speak life. 

28) You marry their family: in daily lives somewhere at some point in some way, every day.

29) Engagement is a weird mix of bliss & everyone’s opinions. 

30) Functional or not; they are there (their family).

31) The bride is always right (weddings).

32) It’s a new level of different going from engaged to married.

33) Splitting holidays between families. 

34) You have to do what is best for your family; sometimes telling somebody “no.”

35) Do something with your spouse as your own special thing before you go see family.

36) Reach out to other people outside of your family that may have no place to go for holidays.

37) It can be hard to let go sometimes. 

38) You don't have to absolutely always be on the exact same page theologically, or at all, so don't freak out over some little small agreement. 

39) If you are dating a non-believer, stop. 

40) You are not each other’s pastor.

41) Accountability partners of same sex. 

42) Don’t try to give them all the answers in a season. 

43) You journey together.

44) They are just as weak and vulnerable as you are.

45) You can always learn something from your spouse.

46) Your marriage isn't anybody else’s. Don’t try to be another couple; you are NOT “the perfect couple…”

47) How you perceive someone should be can be dangerous and toxic…

48) Please don’t force them to be something they are not.

49) Don’t allow in unhealthy expectations of yourself or your spouse.

50) Each relationship is different. 

51)[://Don’t divide and conquer; unite and accomplish//:]

52) Reality is messy.

53) Invest time in strong Christian couples (friends)

54) Don’t put on facades.

55) You can’t avoid ups and downs of life. 

56) Every relationship should be driven by friendship.

57) What does that person look like when…?

58) Engaging one another spiritually even if the way you engage is different. 

59) Find one way that you can minister together.

60) Learn to appreciate each other’s values…remember to admire your spouse.

61) Take joy in what they are learning; even if it might be intimidating. 

62) My relationship with God is no lesser than my spouse’s.

63) Children in ministry: PK’s (Pastor Kids)—>there is a spectrum of following Christ or choosing not to

—>Be their parent first.

—>Surround yourself with mentors

64) Wellness counseling (individual and together)

65) Professional counseling before marriage (not people you know)

66) It’s okay to say you need help in your relationship (ALWAYS)—>do not wait too long.

67) Counseling can save marriages many times.

68) Sometimes you need to make some major life changes

69) Ministry will cost you in your marriage

70) How did you love your husband? your children? your family? NOT: how big was my ministry? etc?

71) When you don’t know yourself, you can’t love somebody else.

72) Each marriage has their own problems.

73) Our children should be treated like every other kid in the church. NO special treatment. 

74) Don’t let them put expectations on you and your family (examine it).

75) [://It all comes back to priorities//:]

—>What do you have to cut to come back and save what is dying? (Bob Goff)

76) TRUTH: Ministry is super prone to affairs: very unexpected people: no one is immune to that: it is such a people person job: really guard & protect and know it is a reality.

77) Your spouse’s job is not to guard your heart: YOU GUARD YOUR OWN.

78) Stop getting only the help you WANT.

79) Our parents always love us even if they don’t communicate it correctly.

80) Get advice from a couple that you admire.

81) Allow yourself to find and know and spend time around good relational marriages.

82) With God and the help of the Church, it is possible.

83) Have things to be proud of in your spouse.

84) Pride in awe.

(what He has done through your spouse)

If you are reading this, share it with those who you think would appreciate it. Think about it. May He bless you wherever you are in life. He loves you.

Much love.

Rachel Yvonne 

Yearning for...?

So, in my life, there has been a decent number of people that I have truly gotten to know; and I mean, really know. Some, I did, but through time, and distance, what I knew of them was only but a memory. I love people. Always have & always will. There is something about each story that is different and it's intriguing. My story is one like no one else's; I know. Someone else's story is so different from mine. We each have our own struggles, wins, losses, breakups, embarrassments, addictions, and joys. And each of those changes the world, if only a little, each passing day. I have come to think about a lot lately of why, in this world where we can all relate, and are united in some way shape or form, do I yearn for more? More of what? I believe that nothing in this life will fully satisfy our finite and selfish selves. Never. We are always looking for more. Even when it seems as though we have all we need. For myself, I have questions of: who will I fall in love with? Where will my career go? What places will I travel to next? Will I be a good mother? Will I be a mother? How will I change the world? How can I love people better? How long will I live? The answers to these questions will remain unknown until we actually are living them. Which is what makes life so crazy, right? 

I would love to fall in love someone who has similar, yet not completely exact, motives, dreams and a personality that meshes perfectly with mine, yet still there be room for constructive criticism. I want to fall for him over and over and over again with every day. I want to learn and grow with him in our passions for our lives. Differences are present; but that is what keeps it interesting. I will learn to love the Lord better because of him. 

I do not know where my career will go. I have my dreams. And they are becoming more of a reality each day; and yes, my soul is ecstatic. I would like to see my career work for the bettering and love for people, to use my musical ability, and to reach the nations and my home nation. I do not know where I will travel to next; His lamp is a light unto my feet, so I follow Him. 

I would love to be a good mother. At least, I hope that I will be. 

I want to change the world so that people will know how loved they are. And how beautiful their lives of dust can be. I can testify to a few things of dust, dirt and mud in my life. They will know.

I thank Him for every morning that I wake up and have the beautiful privilege of living another day. Life is far too short to not be thankful. And often, we forget. I know I do. I take a lot of my days for granted because in those days, it is "all about me" and what I need to do, and how busy I am, and yadda yadda yadda. 

I yearn for a lot. Much more than is ever said on this page at this moment. I yearn for a life of abundance; and I live it every day. I learn something new every day; and its challenging, frustrating, wonderful and sometimes, emotional. But this life, I won't ever forget. It is a story. Unfolding its crisp, new pages every day; waiting to be seen and explored. 

That is all for today. Much love. 

Rachel Yvonne